The best way out is always through

One night this week I got home from work just before 9pm. I was tired, the day had been long and stressful at times but I was glad to be home.  As I was working late my parents had been looking after my dogs and the house was eerily quite. My ex had been to…

Gratitude

As part of my OA programme suggestions I have to write down ten things each day that I am grateful for.  When I first started to do this I really struggled, I asked other fellows how they composed their lists and was told to think of everything I had that someone else might not. Running…

Hurt – The first heartbreak

Although this song has only just been released it transports me back to being 20 and being in an endless cycle of push and pull with my first love. I was totally besotted with this guy. He was the perfect boyfriend and honestly spoiled me for every man who followed. We went out for 2…

The pursuit of happiness

I’ve mentioned in previous posts my desire to feel happy and how i’m perplexed that this magic feeling has always seemed to allude me. Yes I’ve had moments of happiness but it has never seemed to stay with me.  I had a lovely evening watching Green Day in Hyde Park last weekend and a couple…

Cuddle buddies 

Laying in bed this weekend enjoying a post coital cuddle I felt content for the first time all week. Thinking about this the following day I realised I often enjoy the cuddles more than the sex. I guess it’s the comfort of having someone close and there is something about this time that I love….

Detaching with love

I’ve recently started going to going to meetings to learn more about both my mums alcoholism and my habit of eating my feelings. I really wish I had known about Al Anon when I was a teenager. I really do think my life would have been very different. There is something very therapeutic about being…

Don’t stop till you get enough

How often would you want to have sex? Once a week, once a day, once a month?! I thought I had a pretty normal sex drive but when a third guy commented that he couldn’t keep up with me I realised maybe it was higher than other women.  I had just assumed that twice a…

The one that went up a mountain

Now as full disclosure the person this post is about is actually who inspired me to write a blog.  He has several of his own including one about his dating trials and tribulations (I didn’t know about the dating blog at the time) and after telling him some of my horror stories he suggested I…

Lady Wood

Love, love, love this song and seems appropriate given I that I pretty much always have lady wood! Perfect imperfections, with mistakes and a unlearned lessons yeah, you give me wood Give me lady wood Dirty on the inside, damaged goods with nothing but pride yeah, you give me wood Give me lady wood  …

The one where I wasn’t his Disney princess

This date was my first from using dating apps and clearly an omen of what was to come!! It was also a good lesson in learning to trust my gut instinct as I almost cancelled the day before after having reservations but didn’t as I would have felt mean. I’m clearly too nice for this…

Tears of a clown

It’s safe to say I’ve spent an inordant amount of time crying over the last few years.  Quite frankly I’m bored of it.  I used to cry and cry asking why can’t I just be happy.  Why can everyone else feel this magical feeling but me.  I chased things thinking once I’d ticked the thing…

Save as Draft

Being a lover of pop music I was excited for the new Katy Perry release but when I listened to it I really had a hard time finding a track I loved. I still play Teenage Dream weekly as it never fails to put me in a good mood but Witness just wasn’t doing it…