As part of my OA programme suggestions I have to write down ten things each day that I am grateful for.  When I first started to do this I really struggled, I asked other fellows how they composed their lists and was told to think of everything I had that someone else might not. Running water, a bed to sleep in, warmth, safety. After considering these things I honestly felt like a brat. We get so consumed with things we don’t have its hard to remember all the wonderful things we take for granted.

Writing this list is now becoming a favourite part of my day. I often write notes on my phone throughout the day when something good happens so I can remember to jot it down as part of my list before I go to sleep at night. Its such a lovely way to end the day.

Changing my way of thinking and generally feeling more gratful for the life I have has made me look at online dating in a different way. Yes there were lots of duff encounters but even from the most awkward of dates I have some made some amazing friends that have ended up having an influence on my life.   From encouraging me to go to OA, giving me legal advice, calling me daily when they knew I was having a particularity down week, taking me out to experience new things and offer up genuine help when I have needed it.

One of the things I struggled with when I separated from my husband was the lack of single friends in my life to go and have fun with, these new friends have certainly filled that void for me. Even though the dates may not have worked out to be romantically successful the majority have been a benefit to my life and for that I am really grateful.



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